I know I am not the only one…The mama who is hard on herself even when she is giving everything in her to love, provide, make happy and parent to the point that there’s nothing left of yourself. It usually takes another individual, more often than not your very own child(ren) to remind you that you are a great parent. I don’t know why we drive ourselves up the wall attempting to be the ultimate”Shero”, but I believe that for the majority of us it’s just pure instinct minus wanting to be competitive. We cannot help ourselves. To feel needed is fuel!
However, how do we set boundaries to still be true to ourselves and not forget who we were|are before we became moms? This week I have seen this meme floating around that says, “Me trying to excel in my career, maintain a social life, drink enough water, exercise, text everybody back, stay sane, survive and be happy.” I mean the accuracy here! Ladies, we have the weight of what the world says is acceptable on our shoulders and it can be daunting when we feel that we are not doing enough. This meme described me and my hectic schedule precisely!
I remember when I became a mom I was prepared to take on the role, but I had no idea how much of myself I was losing or was supposed to lose. It goes with out saying that parenthood completely changes the dynamics of your life, your income, time and activities. For many we feel that we have leveled up in a way that says you can no longer go out or just have me time because well you decided to have a child.
Prime example…For me, becoming a mom meant that I gave up things like spending an entire evening watching my favorite television shows mainly because I was completely exhausted. Before long if I did get the opportunity to turn on the tube, I was singing the intro to the likes of Dora the Explore, Word World, Sesame Street (a guilty pleasure) and The Backyardigans! However, over the past few years I have started to enjoy a few programs again. One that I have really enjoyed currently, is Jane The Virgin which airs on the CW.
Thanks to Netflix I have been able to catch up on the first two seasons. S2E4, “Chapter Twenty-Six” really struck a cord with me. The Episode does a beautiful job of portraying what so many Mamas on the Move experience. Jane is a new mom with ambition and goals. After having her son she decides that she must continue her original plan to attend college. Eventually, she is struggling to get her assignments done, plan her best friends birthday party and be “Mom of the Year.” She becomes so lost in trying to be everything for everyone else she no longer recognizes herself.
So what happens when you hit a cross rode like this. Giving my all to my child to the point of losing self was very apparent in my life, but I was not aware of it until he was four years young and I was presented with an opportunity to travel to Las Vegas for my home based business’ annual convention. I was a war with myself, “Should I go? Is it worth it? Finally, I said, “You know you have been so diligent as a mother you deserve to do this and he will be fine.” Going on that trip opened my mine to a ton of opportunities and the leverage to dream again.
One of the biggest dreams was my pursuit in modeling. I had relocated to central Arkansas for college and maybe a chance to make it big modeling. I discovered it was much more to it than that and after about a year I placed that idea on the back burner. In 2012 I hit a hard patch, but I was soon lifted with an opportunity to model locally and it really helped me as I coped with divorce and being a single parent. I felt lost, but I honest was rediscovering and finding myself.
As of 2017 I have modeled for major charity events with designers Linda Rowe Thomas and Korto Momolu to name a few! I was also blessed to work on and be in the film, “God’s Not Dead 2”!The end of 2016 I began working more closely with local fashion boutique, RK Collections to do segments on Good Day Arkansas at Fox 16. You guys its hard work because I try to keep in shape not for the modeling aspect, but because I can’t afford to be sick. Add in working full time, dating, helping with homework and prepping 3 square meals per day it equates to a extremely active and hectic lifestyle.
The following is a Day Diary of how I balance a crazy scheduled day. Enjoy!
On occasion I will receive a text from RK Collection’s stylist asking if I am available for a 6:45 AM call time the following day. If the response is a yes, I will receive in the next few hours pictures of what I will be featured in.
Having this information is vital because I am responsible for my own hair and makeup and that allows for me to plan my makeup look! As you can see I am going to wear light flare jeans (could even be paired with skinny jeans), and off the shoulder pink top, hat, dangle necklace and wedges! This look is going to be very cute and it has the retro 70’s vibe…In love!
Since, I don’t have time to go to the nail salon I will prep my nails after dinner and right before bed. I will also do flat twist on my hair to achieve beautiful, voluminous waves without the heat. Once I wake up at around 5:30 I give thanks, drink some water and begin my skincare and makeup routine.
So my makeup is done minus the lips, I will do that once I’am changed, Since my hair is natural and it has been raining I will leave it twisted until I get there as well.
Finally, I am dresses and we are about to go on the air to do our teaser. It’s always an adrenaline rush and it is so fun! There is nothing like playing dress up!
Myself and these two lovelies Allison and Jessica!!! ♥
My son stays behind and watches me on television and that way he feels involved, but I don’t have to drag him around so early in the AM! He gets a kick out of it! Doing this is so fulfilling to me and it keeps me grounded. Now the segment is down and we have taking all our selfies and chatted and then I head home to get changed for work and get my son off to school!
You can watch the segment here if you like: http://www.fox16.com/klrt-good-day/style-file-soft-sweet-spring-looks-from-rk-collections/661213552
He’s such a silly boy! I supports what I love because he knows that I do the same for him! We have such an awesome bond and we are a great boy+mom duo! With just five minutes to spare I get him dropped off and send him off with positive words and love to get him through the day.
I arrive at work with 10 minutes to spare. As I wait for my heart rate to slow down I found myself asking, “Is it worth it?” “Would you do it all over again?”Although, I wish there circumstances were a bit different and conducive of me being a SAHM my answer is yes. My passions give me meaning, purpose and a drive to be better for me and my son! My goal is to remain true, have balance and be that example to my son! I sure hope I am.
The take away! Let chat. Tell me what your schedules are like and if you related to this post. How do you balance this fast paced world and keep sane in the process? I would love to hear about it!